Maintaining close bonds with friends is crucial to our health.
A growing epidemic in the United States, loneliness affects thousands of people. But unlike with cancer or diabetes, not everyone understands its severity or its impact on our physical and mental health.
Loneliness is an emotional state that stems from social isolation, or a lack of meaningful relationships, social contact or support. In 2023, the U.S. Surgeon General released a report claiming that 1 in 2 American adults is lonely. The report also found that this is partly due to a significant decline in friendships over the past several decades.
People who feel lonely may desire a deeper level of connection with others than they actually have. Let's take a closer look at friendship and why it's important for our mental health to form close connections with others.
Why is friendship important?
Society tends to emphasize romantic relationships as the most important form of connection, but friendship is just as vital for maintaining a healthy and meaningful life. While a Pew Research Center survey found that 23% of U.S. adults felt being married is important for living a fulfilling life, 61% said close friendships are essential.
But what is it about building and maintaining friendships that contributes to well-being? It's not just that it feels good to be around someone with whom we have shared values and interests. Friends can help us feel less lonely and isolated. Whether we realize it or not, these feelings can have a negative impact on our mental and physical health.
How do loneliness and social isolation affect our health?
Even before the stay-at-home orders and quarantines of the COVID-19 pandemic, millions of Americans were dealing with loneliness and isolation — and many still are. A recent poll from the American Psychiatric Association (APA) found that 43% of adults felt their levels of loneliness had not changed since the pandemic and a quarter said they were lonelier.
Research has found that social isolation and loneliness are linked to an increased risk of several health conditions, including:
- Addiction
- Dementia
- Depression and anxiety
- Heart disease and stroke
- Premature death
- Type 2 diabetes
Loneliness has also been linked to higher cortisol levels — the stress hormone — in the body, leading to headaches, trouble sleeping, weight gain and more.
What are the health benefits of friendship?
Friendship is important for combating loneliness and staying healthy, in body and mind.
People who have friends and close confidants are more satisfied with their lives and less likely to suffer from depression, according to a 2020 study published in the American Journal of Psychiatry. Research has also found that close friendships can change how we respond to stress. When we talk to a supportive friend, for example, our blood pressure reactivity — a pattern showing how our blood pressure responds to psychological stress over time — is lower than when we talk to someone we have mixed feelings about.
Having good friends can also boost our feelings of self-esteem and self-worth. APA research has found that positive social relationships and support shape the development of self-esteem in children and adults of all ages. When we have high self-esteem, we typically have better friendships, creating a positive feedback loop.
How to make new friends later in life
If you feel like it's hard to make new friends as an adult, you're not alone. During college, there are seemingly endless opportunities to meet new people — in the classroom, at sporting events, social clubs, parties and other places. But as older adults, we may go straight home from work (if we have to leave the house at all), making it harder to meet people organically. Add partners, children and other responsibilities to the mix, and we simply don't have time to expand our social circles.
But making friends as an adult is possible if you're willing to put in the time and effort. Here are some things to try:
- Get involved in your community: Participating in local events is a great way to meet new people. Try volunteering, taking classes that interest you or frequenting a local spot — like a community garden, bookstore or restaurant — to meet people with shared interests.
- Join a club, gym or sports team: Regular group activities can help you develop familiarity and rapport with others. Having a shared interest helps break the ice so you can start getting to know new people. Running groups, book clubs and recreational sports teams are all great places to start.
- Reach out to old friends: If you've lost touch with old friends, try reconnecting. After all, you already have a foundation you can build on — and plenty to catch up on.
- Make connections through others: One of the most common ways to meet new people is through those you already know. Family members, acquaintances and even coworkers may be able to introduce you to others with shared interests, so ask around.
In a world where loneliness is becoming a public health emergency, it's never been more important to prioritize connection. Although meeting new people isn't always easy as we get older, it's crucial to our health to maintain close bonds with others.
Find information about mental health resources from our larger health network, HCA Healthcare.
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